Forever and More

Here I sit on the floor,
Bathed in pain that feels forever and more.
Lying at my feet
Are the broken pieces of my life,
Cut from chaos, forged in strife.
How will I be put back together again?
When I don't have the bond, I don't hold the pen.
I take each piece, tell it goodbye,
Knowing each is a sacrifice, necessary to die.
With each farewell, the pain becomes more,
Until I don't feel my heart beat within its core.
But there is a hope that glints off each piece,
It mirrors a Light that can never cease.
That Light has the bond, holds the pen,
To put my life back together again.
Broken I may be,
But destroyed I am not.
The Light has the last say,
For it with His blood I have been bought.
Forever and more He will be my Light,
The bond, the pen, and the giver of a new life.

Reflection

1 Peter 4:10 says ‘Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.’ So when God called me  to be a writer, I knew it was to be for His Kingdom and His purpose. I’ve always known that I had the God given gift to write stories, but until I was called, I had only used the gift for me. 

So I found myself in a daunting place, unknown territory-how was I to break beyond the borders of self and use my gift of writing to serve others, to reach a lost world for Jesus?

Many times I sat staring at a blank page, wondering how and where to begin. The fear and trepidation of baring my soul to a world with a story from my heart was overwhelming. What would people think of me? Am I really good enough to do this? 

These questions plagued my mind every time I sat before that blank page. This was a cycle I could not break until I shifted from myself to my Savior. I realized this story wouldn’t bare my soul, it would bare His! This story wouldn’t be for my recognition, it would be for His! I am not good enough to write this story, but Christ in me is!

Until I put fear aside and came boldly to His throne of grace in my time of need, was I able to begin to pour words onto a page. In three months I had written almost a quarter of a million words, effortlessly, all to His glory. Only a few months later, my novel was published, again all to His glory. 

Those words I wrote comprised a story that would display the redemptive love of the God I serve, a gracious Father who calls us to use our gifts with boldness for His Kingdom.

So I leave you with where I started- 1 Peter 4:10-How am I to use this gift of writing to serve others? How are you to use your gift to serve others? You see, it’s all in your approach! You have to be bold and go for it! Just begin, knowing it’s for your Savior and His glory! Have the courage to boldly say, “Here I am God, send me!”